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carrie's Blog

07/27/05

SINGING IN THE SHAME

Filed under: Posts — carrie @ 10:13:48 am

Into every life, a little shame must fall... but you don't have to go down with it.

Looking around, it's easy to see who's been drenched by the torrential downpoars of dating disasters or dilemmas; they're the people with their umbrellas as their hearts up on guard at all times. If you've been hurt, rejected or neglected in any way, you know what I mean.

In a crowded downtown Toronto bar one night, after somewhat ungracefully encountering my drunken ex-boyfriend and his paranoid (of me) fiancee, I decided to turn my night around and take the plunge by asking out the classy guy I'd had my eye on. Naturally, before approaching him I did the once-over on myself. And I was fabulous. So I walked my sexy gold camisole, flowing black Aritsia capris, Guess stilettos and a fresh spa hairdo to-die-for over to where he was sitting-- not forgetting, of course, to smile all the while. Gesturing for me to sit next to him, I placed my petite frame beside the only man in the place I cared to be next to. So far things were looking good. As awkward small talk steadily spat, a little voice in my head (or was it my ex's fiance?) pushed me to 'take a chance you stupid ho!' And I did. But instead of the expected response, his dark, rejecting eyes seemed to form into two black clouds that rained all over my snob parade.

And right there in public and in front of the man I was crushing on, I got crushed.

Somehow I pulled myself away from the situation and made it back to my friends... but my umbrella - my guard - never went up.

My point?
Sure my petals get a little shaky from the moist now and then (yes, I am still talking about rejection!) but delicate as I look, I am strong enough to let the pressures roll right off, and smart enough to use what I can as building tools, to grow. The point is not to shield yourself behind your experiences, (what's next, a full yellow raincoat as our guard? No thank you) but to keep your head high, even through a storm. And remember, a little rain never hurt anybody. Without it, how would we grow??

So ladies, when you see what you want, go out there and grab it. (Not literally...) because there is nothing wrong with rejection and nothing right about regret. And nothing stings more than seeing the one you want with someone else all because you didn't mark your territory in time. This next sentence is very anti-Greg Behrendt but ... go out and get em, girls!! No point in wasting time when you could just as easily be with your crush, or at least know if 'He's Just Not That Into You'. If this is the case, shake it off and move on swiftly to the next available soldier ... watcha waitin for?!

So I welcome rejection, if it happens to occur. Cause in the end, it only enunciates my personal slogan all the more ~ 'Single and Fabulous'. And every now and then, you just might find me dancing - and singing - in the 'shame'.

~xox

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